For the boys.
No one has ever taken asexuals less seriously for saying “ace” or using the asexual flag or saying cake jokes. In fact, we are starting to get more and more visibility than ever before and being taken seriously by other GSRM groups than ever before.
Every minority group has its…
Anonymous asked: I might sound really ignorant but I thought asexual meant that you didn't participate in sex or sex related activities. Is that what this blog is about or has asexual become a whole different thing or has it always been and I was just wrong??
hey there anon! I think, if anything, you are just a victim of poor visibility and lack of education about education.
actually, asexuality is a lack of feeling sexual attraction. this means that when an asexual looks at someone, though they may find them attractive in other ways, they wont feel sexual arousal from the way that person looks. this does not negate sexual arousal (such as from hormones or viewing sexual acts like porn) or enjoying/engaging in sex or sex-like things. an asexual could have sex all day and have a blast doing it, or do it to make their partner happy, but they will not feel arousal from the way that someone looks.
as an ace, i personally don’t know how to really describe sexual attraction, but i do know that i, and other aces, do not feel it. the name for what you were describing, however is called celibacy, which is the choice to not have sex or related activities. celibacy is a choice while asexuality is not.
hope this helps!
One of the uglier conversations that I’ve seen occur a few times around the concept of asexuality as a legitimate sexual orientation—and it is legitimate in the way that the multiple queer sexual orientations are (though “queer” doesn’t only speak to sexual orientation) and of course the…
there’s 15 year olds on this website who already know they’re asexual that is incredible just incredible when I was 15 all I knew was that I was broken and that something was clearly wrong with me. say what you want about tumblr but I think we can agree that spreading knowledge about alternative sexualities is something done really well here and to the benefit of so many.
Anonymous asked: I'm 15 and I think I'm going to come out as heteromantic asexual. It's a recent revelation for me but I feel confident about it. even though I live in a really supportive environment, I feel kind of worried, not because of people's reactions but because I feel like it will drive away people who I might want to have a romantic relationship with. I'm not ashamed of my sexuality, and I don't want to change anyone else's, but how can I make a sexual person comfortable in a non-sexual relationship?
So you probably would know that I am in an asexual/allosexual relationship. There are a few things that asexuals do do, but the biggest and most important thing is to communicate. And communicate you will have to do.
So, ways to help someone comfortable in a non-sexual relationship:
-S/He maybe comfortable having a sexless relationship. S/He maybe asexual as well, or even have a very low sex drive.
-Tell your partner you are comfortable with him/her going out and have sexual relations with another, however, it can/can not turn romantic and you want him/her to tell you. (I told my boyfriend this, the response I got from his was complete horror and saying he will never)
-Work on our terms, do things when you want to and do what you want.
-You do something sexual on occasion.
Relationships are something that plenty of asexuals worry about. And I will say now, some allosexuals will not mind. My boy knew I was asexual WAY before he asked me out. And here we are 7 months later and I can honestly say that I love the dimwit to pieces. Just communication is the key. If you don’t communicate, it will all go down the drain.
Anonymous asked: Hi! So, I'm pretty young, like just getting out/just out of puberty, but I've never felt any sexual attraction to anyone, I've never been interested and I don't see myself being interested in the future. is it okay if I ID myself as an ace despite my young age? I do feel romantically.
I have only 15, I’ve seen 13y/old’s ID as ace…
Anonymous asked: I'm asexual and currently I feel there's a problem with me. I was with this guy but he was extremely lustful and I had to leave, do other ace's experience a feeling of not being good enough?I did bring up I was asexual but he said it was fine but he still being up a lot of sexual desires making me feel uncomfortable. I feel like my relationships will all fail, is it normal to feel this way?
Yes it’s normal to feel this way. I asked a question not long ago what is the worst ting about bingace,most of the replies were that they would never have a partner. And Im an ace in a relationship and I always feel like Im not good enough, driving my poor bf up the wall with it.
But you will discover that you can have a relationship and it will not fail because of your sexuality, or lack of. Finding a partner who is open minded and doesn’t care that you’re ace is key. Then communication is vital.
Anonymous asked: Does being a late bloomer have to do with going thru puberty? Cuz I went thru puberty 5+ yrs ago and haven't experienced sexual attraction. Could I still be a late bloomer? Sorry, I'm just really confused...
I believe it does.
However, the time you ID as ace doesn’t matter a lot if you are going through puberty or if its afterwards.
I have seen 13 year olds ID as ace, they would have been only just coming out of puberty, or still going through.
I was 15 at the time I ID-ed.
And if you’re a late bloomer, at five years plus afterwards, I’ll eat cotton balls.
herf-the-cuddleslut asked: I'm a 16 year old asexual and I was talking to my boyfriend (who doesnt know) about how dating me is great because no pressure to kiss and be physical. And he basically described asexuality to me without saying he'sasexual. I doubt he knows what 1/2
Asexuality is. Should I let him know that he could be asexual? Should I come out to him? If so, how? (2/2)
Mm, what to do here…
Okay, do what you feel is best, like if I say yes or no (which I wont) you don’t HAVE to do it unless your comfortable with your choice.
But if you do, there are a few ways to do it.
One way is to talk about asexuality directly by using someone else. I.e. saying that your friend just came out as asexual and see how he responds, if good you come out, if bad you don’t.
Another is a letter (which I did), where you just say your asexual and explain it.
Another is just flat out tell him. Hey babe, Im asexual. I don’t feel sexual attraction.
Do whatever way you feel comfortable with. Again you don’t have to do any of these ways, its just some ways people do it. Just because it is your boyfriend, it maybe wise to explain romantic attraction. You don’t want him to feel like you don’t like/love him whatever you do. If your aromantic, I dunno what to do there, and our lovely Raven can take over.
But to tell your boyfriend that you think he maybe asexual. That is a hard one, seriously do what your comfortable with. You coud like hint here or there, or tell him out right. Or if you came out to him, that may make him think.
Hope I helped,